It Was Always You
by ailaikannu
Summary: Based on this Tumblr post:Soulmate au where when you write something on your skin with whatever the hell you want, it will show up on your soul mate's skin as well. A super artistic soulmate who draws flowers and designs and really beautiful patterns all over their arms and person 2 just sits there and watches the little lines appear on their arms.
1. Forest Fires

She enjoyed drawing on her forearm way too much. Being an artist, Clarke sometimes found herself feeling the need to draw even when she didn't have any kind of paper with her. She always had a marker in her purse, though. Wherever she went, she'd take it with her. She knew about the soulmate thing and found it kind of weird. Sometimes even creepy. But it didn't bother her at all, because her soulmate apparently didn't enjoy drawing. She had never seen anything on her skin but her own drawings. Sometimes she desperately wanted to see something appear on her skin. Anything, really. A sign. Even a small marking on her fingers got by mistake by her person while writing. It drove her crazy.

"Maybe my soulmate already dislikes me because I spend too much time drawing. They probably already know how obsessed I am with art and they hate it. That's why they never draw anything back." She said, her voice low. She was drawing a lily on her right forearm, not paying too much attention to it. It was mostly out of habit.

"Maybe they're not born yet. Maybe your soulmate is going to be twenty years younger than you." Rave started laughing as Clarke shot her a death glare.

Both Raven and Octavia got their drawings. Raven's soulmate wrote chemistry stuff, which Raven weirdly enjoyed, while Octavia's wrote mainly lists. Raven didn't feel ready to meet her soulmate yet, she enjoyed her life of partying and getting wasted, while Octavia kind of felt the need to meet hers. She was waiting for her person to write down a place name, so that she could go find them. She had thought about simply writing something like "I want to meet you" on her hand, but she wanted everything to happen when it was time.

Clarke felt a bit left out. Or possibly even jealous. Octavia and Raven knew something about their soulmates, Raven's was a big chemistry nerd, while Octavia's was a bit forgetful. At least, they had something to clinge on.

She was the only one basically drawing to herself. It felt weird, and wrong. Why wasn't her soulmate answering ? Or at least showing that they existed ?

"Maybe I'm destined to be alone, guys." She whispered.

Her friends looked at her, with that usual look. "Maybe they don't enjoy drawing and that's it." Octavia said, avoiding Clarke's gaze.

Clarke sighed, knowing there was no way for her to actually know what was going on. Usually, the drawings started appearing around a person's sixteenth birthday. Clarke had already starting drawing on her arms way before her sixteenth birthday, mainly because drawing was her thing and her arms were always the "closest thing I can draw on, dad !" She was, anyhow, getting tired of staring at her blank arms. She was going to turn twenty in a couple of weeks, which meant approximatively four years with no signs from her soulmate.

"Alright, let's go to class. I don't want to be late because of you, _again_." She said, getting up.

Both Octavia and Raven groaned, getting up from the couch. "Alright, mom. Shame on me for thinking that choosing a major different from the one you chose would make me live a calm and carefree life. Shame on me." Raven sighed.

"Oh, come on. If it wasn't for me, you'd still be wandering around the hallway, looking for your dorm room. Even when you perfectly knew that you didn't have one." Clarke laughed and grabbed her laptop before leaving the room. "Come on, we're going to be late."

Raven rolled her eyes, but followed her silently, while Octavia looked for her books. "No worries, I can be late. Luckily for me, my class is far away from Clarke's ! Have fun, I'll see you later."

Clarke hated being late. She wanted to sit in a specific place, not too near the professor, but not too far back. She also wanted to sit next to the window, it made her feel like she was taking classes outside.

Luckily for her, her usual place was waiting for her. She walked towards it and placed her bag next to her chair and then proceeded to turn on her laptop. She enjoyed taking notes on her laptop, because most of her professors talked way faster than necessary, it was hard to keep up with their pace. The molecular biology lecture was boring, as per usual. She checked her phone, to find a notification on her groupchat with Octavia and Raven.

 **TheGreatMechanic 10a.m :**

Yo Griffin, guess what I just saw

 **ClarkeFromTheSky**

I'm in class, Raven.

 **TheGreatMechanic 10:18 a.m :**

I know that u hate molecular biology, ur always complaining about the shitload of stuff you have to study for that class

S

I might have found u a boyfriend.

 **OctaviaTheWarrior 10.19 a.m :**

Big nerd is going to kill egocentric mechanic, someone send help.

 **TheGreatMechanic 10.22 a.m**

O, why isn't she replying ? And no one can hear u, it's just us in the groupchat u moron

 **OctaviaTheWarrior 10.25 a.m :**

You're so dead. If Clarke doesn't kill you, I will.

 **TheGreatMechanic 10.33 a.m :**

I find her a boyfriend and she kills me ? That's not fair

Why do I always end up getting killed ? Let me check his arms for one of Clarke's masterpieces.

Clarke stared at her phone amused, making a mental note :

Kill Raven Reyes once you get home.

She was always telling her that she should date more, but Clarke was kind of obsessed with the whole soulmate thing. Maybe they were right and her soulmate hadn't been born yet. Which meant she'd have to wait at least eighteen years before getting to know them. Raven didn't really care about her marks. She was amused by the interest for chemistry, but she was aware that once she'd find that person, her dating life would be over. She enjoyed having fun with different people too much to let her life go, which was the main reason why whe wasn't looking for her person.

When her class was over, she walked to the park. She enjoyed spending her free time sitting under a tree, possibly reading a book or listening to some music. The apartment she shared with Octavia and Raven could be quite loud and she enjoyed her alone time. She loved her friends with her whole heart, but she loved the tranquility of the park as opposed to their never ending need for chaos and loud music. She sat down right in front of her usual tree and closed her eyes, while music flowed from her ears to her brain. She imagined she was in a forest, surrounded by trees and the smell of pine she loved so much. She felt happy, until something collided with her foot and she suddenly felt a freezing liquid splashing all over her. She was ready to kill anyone who'd probably ruined her clothes and her calm moment, but when she opened her eyes, something changed.

She was in the forest.

She could almost smell the pines.

Or at least, the forest green eyes of the person standing just above her made her feel like she was in the actual forest.

 _I painted you a picture, picture full of light. It includes a heavy memory, memory so bright_  
 _I can't change your thoughts, my dear. I can't change your fears. But if you want I'll traver near to make it disappear._  
 _I'll be there in the summer 'cause your heart isn't safe, you won't go, you are not a runner, so you won't run away. If you could follow your heart gently there wouldn't be this mess. Maybe someday, just someday you'll find a way back._  
 _Your dreams are incredibly loud tonight, you're creating forest fires. You can't even change your sight, it's stuck in you like a virus._


	2. Kiss The Sky

**Hi guys, I wanted to let you know that I'll be posting one chapter a day since I'm posting this story on another website as well. I will be posting one chapter a day till I get to where I am on the other site and then I'll staart posting twice a week. Thank you for all the love, it's greatly appreciated. I really hope you guys are okay after last night's finale, because I've seriously been crying since it begun. (Badass two swords superhero Lexa is amazing.)**

She smiled as a beautiful, flawless lily appeared on her right forearm.

Lexa had a weird passion for flowers, she enjoyed their colour, their perfume, she loved everything about them. They were the only source of colour she allowed in her elegant black and white apartment, together with the insane amount of candles she owned. She was sitting on her black leather couch while she watched the black marks appear on her skin and she couldn't help but think about the person drawing them. Lexa supposed it was a woman, the delicate drawings she was so used to now were one more reason to believe it was a woman. The perfection in every drawing made her think about someone who enjoyed calmness and serious conversations. She enjoyed thinking about this person, imagining who she might be. Imagining what she might look like. Imagining what she smelled like, what colour her eyes were. A knock on the door startled her from her dreaming sate and she got up to see who it was, even if she already knew who to expect.

"Who is it ?" She asked, approaching the door.

"You'd never guess" She heard the familiar voice saying. She unlocked the door and was greeted by her older sister.

"Anya, hey. What are you doing here ? I thought we were meeting for lunch."

Her sister walked inside Lexa's apartment and closed the door behind her back, following Lexa to the couch. "I know, I just wanted to talk to you about something and I couldn't wait till lunch time."

Lexa frowned at her, a little worried. "What did you want to talk about ?"

"Uncle Gustus asked me if you're planning on coming to that family reunion I was talking to you about." Anya looked sheepishly at her.

"Anya." Lexa sighed.

"You know it would mean a lot to all of them. All of us." Anya's voice was steady and low.

"I won't hear this again." Lexa turned around, she couldn't look at her sister.

"Yes, you will. You can't avoid family meetings just because of what happened. It's our family, Lexa." Anya was begging, as she always was when it came to their family reunions. She was usually stern and a bit cold, but she did care about her family. It was the most important thing in her life.

" _Just_ because of what happened ? Are you trying to belittle our parents' death ?" Lexa was screaming now, unable to keep her feelings for herself.

"Of course I'm not. I'm just telling you that our family misses you. You were fifteen when they last saw you, it's been seven years." Anya tried to remain calm. She perfectly knew how their parents' death had affected Lexa. It had affected her as well, but Lexa was basically a child when it happened. Anya didn't have the luxury to grieve. She was twenty when they passed away, she was in college, she was living her own life, just realizing what being an adult meant. Then her parents died, and she had to take care of her little sister.

She had to.

"I know. But I can't." Lexa was now facing her sister, with tears in her eyes. "Maybe next year."

Anya was the only person she could bare to see since the death of their parents. Possibly because her sister looked a lot like their mother, or most likely because she loved her with all she had. It was quite hard for her to talk about their death, or just about them in general. She knew her relatives would want to talk about them, not necessarily about their death… But even talking about happy memories with them made her want to run away.

"I have class now, I'll talk to you later."

She left, leaving her sister behind. She was late, as per usual, but it didn't really matter. Her international law professor didn't mind, since she was easily the best student in his class. She was majoring in Legal Studies, she then wanted to go to law school and she enjoyed everything there was to learn. She grabbed her iced tea on her way to class and got there surprisingly only about five minutes late. She was going to have football practice on the afternoon and she was quite excited because she was finally going back after a couple of weeks of mandatory rest after a minor injury during their last match.

 **OctaviaTheWarrior 10:15 a.m**

Woods ! You coming back today ?

 **TheForestCommander 10.37 a.m**

Yep, finally something good, right ?

 **OctaviaTheWarrior 10.39 a.m**

Did you miss me ?

 **TheForestCommander 10.44 a.m**

Definitely missed football. Not so sure about you. Did you miss me ?

 **OctaviaTheWarrior 10.50 a.m**

Lmao no.

I'll see you later, dork. (Try being there on time)

 **TheForestCommander 11 a.m**

You know I can't promise you that. I'll see you later, O.

Octavia was basically the only friend Lexa had made in college. She was living alone, which meant not having roommates and she didn't really do any extracurricular activities, except for football. Octavia was great and she wasn't annoying like the majority of the girls at Polis College, Lexa enjoyed her friendship. Octavia was a bit younger than Lexa, but it didn't really matter, she was great anyhow.

Lexa smiled at her phone, before going back to her notes. She was scribbling whatever the professor was saying, when another of her usual drawings started to appear on her arm. It was a sunflower, this time. It looked a bit different from the usual intricate and flawless designs she was used to seeing. This one looked like the person drawing it was a bit distracted, possibly just feeling the need to doodle something on their arm. Her person did it sometimes, Lexa kind of felt like it represented sadness. Once again, Lexa was tempted to draw something herself, but she stopped. She didn't really know why, but she didn't feel ready to contact her. Not yet.

When the lesson was over, she quickly got up and ran outside, to get back to her apartment. She was running through the park, minding her own business, when her foot collided with something and her tea went flying all over the place. She slowly looked down, hoping to see that her foot was stuck in a tree branch or something, but instead she found herself staring into a girl's eyes.

No, she was wrong.

She was staring at the sky.

 _Am I in love or trippin', now I feel my body driftin'. Baby girl she got me lifted._ _  
Am I addicted?  
She's so fly, excuse her while she kiss the sky, excuse her while she kiss the sky.  
She's so high, excuse her while she kiss the sky, excuse her while she kiss the sky._


	3. Everyone's got Something

None of them talked for a minute, they both stood there in silence, staring at each other. Lexa was still holding her now empty cup, while Clarke was frozen on her knees.

"Oh my God, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry !" The brunette screamed when she realized what had just happened.

Clarke still had her eyes on her. "It's… It's okay, no worries."

"No, please. It's not okay. Let me… I don't even know what to do." Lexa was mortified, as she watched the blonde, who was now covered in iced tea, getting up. Clarke smiled at her and that smile made Lexa's body shiver.

"I'm Clarke." The blonde said, offering her hand.

Lexa looked at it and she felt her heart stop for a second. It was pretty warm outside and Clarke was wearing a short sleeve white t-shirt, which showed her arms. Lexa squinted her eyes, unable to believe what she was staring at.

Her attention was focused on Clarke's right forearm, where a hand drawn sunflower sat.

She swallowed the lump in her throat. "Lexa." She whispered. "But you can call me the Queen of Clumsiness."

"Alright, Queen of Clumsiness will do. Were you running because you're late for class ?" Clarke asked.

"Strangely enough, no. I was going back to my place… I don't even know why I was running. I am so sorry." Lexa blushed and Clarke couldn't help but notice how cute the girl in front of her looked. By the way she was dressed, she figured Lexa was a bit of a perfectionist and it made her giggle. She was wearing black skinny jeans with a grey and black button up and black Nikes. Even in the warm weather, Clarke noticed, Lexa had the buttons on her shirt's cuffs buttoned. Everything she was wearing looked perfectly ironed and studied in order to achieve a perfect colour combination. It was weird, considering the girl had just sent her tea flying all over Clarke.

"It's okay, no need to apologize." Clarke laughed.

Lexa studied Clarke's features. The blonde was gorgeous, with those sky blue eyes and perfect hair. She was wearing a plain white t-shirt and ripped light blue jeans, with a pair of white Converse. Her hair was up in a messy bun, with a blond lock falling on her eyes. Her smile was the eighth wonder of the world to Lexa. Everything about her was magical.

"Do you come here often ? I'm asking just so I can avoid running the next time I have my iced tea with me."

"I do, actually. I live in a flat with two other girls and it can get loud, sometimes. I enjoy spending time here, it's quiet. Sometimes I close my eyes and imagine the forest. Or I spend hours just staring at the sky. I love it." Clarke explained, smiling. Lexa was fascinated by the girl standing in front of her. She wasn't only the most gorgeous thing she'd ever seen, she was also quite charming and sounded like an incredibly intelligent and interesting woman. Different from the others.

"I see… I live on my own, so I don't really need to go out to be quiet… But I understand the need to get outside." Lexa said, starting to gain more confidence. The initial collision with Clarke had left her a bit awestruck, she was usually way smoother than this. "Listen, I have an idea. I feel terribly guilty for splashing my tea all over you, so… Let me buy you a coffee. Or whatever else you might want to drink."

Clarke looked at her in silence for a minute, then nodded. "Yeah, that'd be great."

They walked to the closest café and then sat on a table outside.

"So, what are you majoring it ?" Lexa sked.

"Biology… I'm planning on going to Med School once I'm done here… It's only my second year, but I can't wait to graduate. Med school has been a dream of mine for a long time. What about you ?" When she was a child, Clarke enjoyed listening to her mother talking about cases she had at work and was always imagining herself wearing those scrubs and saving lives.

"I'm majoring in Legal studies, I'm actually going to graduate this year. Then off to Law School !" Lexa explained, possibly a bit too excited, before taking a sip of her coffee.

"Hope you won't be as clumsy as you are now once you become a lawyer." Clarke joked and Lexa blushed. "I'm kidding, I'm sure you'll be a great lawyer."

"I'm usually not this clumsy… I guess. Anyways… Tell me, Sky girl, what do you enjoy doing in your free time ?" Lexa asked, "Apart from making fun of strangers."

"I like drawing, as you might have noticed." She said, exposing her marked forearm. "I also enjoy watching movies. What about you ? When you're not busy sending your iced tea flying all over people you've never seen before."

"I did… I did notice." Lexa said, almost in a whisper. "I guess I enjoy reading quite a bit. I usually enjoy splashing sodas on people I've never seen before, and I also play football."

"My roommate plays football as well, she's kind of obsessed with sports, to be honest."

"Then you have a great roommate ! Sports are great ! Even if you play football and keep getting hurt like I do." She laughed and Clarke felt her heart race in her chest. That sound was like the laughter of angels. The blonde looked at Lexa's eyes once more, she'd never seen anything as beautiful as the girl sitting in front of her.

"See ? I never get hurt, because I don't play sports and I can't get hurt while drawing… " Clarke was smiling, proudly showing off her sunflower.

"I know, but sports help you deal with stress and anger, or whatever else you might feel !" Lexa explained.

"Art helps you deal with your emotions as well, in a different way, I guess."

"Everyone has different ways of dealing with emotions, right ?"

"Yeah… I mean, one of my roommates deals with her feelings by getting wasted and partying till six in the morning…" Clarke laughed, but Lexa looked a bit off.

"That can be effective when neither art nor sports can help you, sometimes feelings are just too much." Lexa stated, her voice low. She was staring at the table beneath her, unable to look at Clarke.

"Yeah, I know what you're talking about." Clarke commented.

Lexa looked up and felt like drowning in those beautiful eyes. For once, she felt understood. She felt like Clarke got her like nobody had before her. She didn't even feel the need to talk about her feelings, or her sad moments, because Clarke got her anyhow. She was there, she had somehow managed to destroy the wall that Lexa had so carefully built up.

That girl was magical.

"I think I should probably go now, I really need a change of clothes !" Clarke laughed once again, making every inch of Lexa's body shiver. That sound was like magic.

"Yes, I guess you should. Again, I'm really sorry." Lexa said, while getting up.

Clarke looked at her and studied her face once again. "No worries. I'll see you around, then. It was nice meeting you, Lexa."

"It was nice meeting you too, Clarke. Too bad it was because I sent my iced tea flying all over you." Lexa blushed again and watched Clarke walk away.

She stood there for a few minutes, unable to move. It felt like time had stopped and she didn't need to rush anymore. She had found her soulmate and she was pretty sure that Clarke's kindness made her fear of meeting her go away. She had thought a lot about the moment she'd meet her, but she imagined it was going to be a bit more… Successful. Or at least not as embarrassing as it had been.

When she got back to her apartment, she found Anya waiting for her.

"What happened to you ? You look shaken, to say the least." Anya asked, a bit worried.

Lexa stood in front of her, speechless. Thinking about what had just happened was one thing, but saying it out loud was different. It made it real.

"I found her, Anya. I found my soulmate."

 _Everyone's got something, something no one else can do, something no one else can see._ _  
And I want you, I want you to know, all I have is you, all I need is you, all I want is you.  
Everyone's got something, darling, I'll let you guide me, tell me that you want me._


	4. Keeping your Head Up

**Chapter Text**

"How can you be that wet when the sun's shining outside ?" Raven asked, from her bedroom's door.

"A girl tripped on my foot while running and her tea splashed all over me." She explained. "Usual Griffin luck."

She heard the apartment getting filled with Raven's joyful laughter, while an annoyed Octavia screamed from her bedroom. "Guys, I really do need to study. You know I have practice this afternoon, which means I only get to study now ! Shut the fuck up !"

Raven looked at Clarke and chuckled softly. Clarke went back to looking for clothes and settled on a pair of navy blue sweatpants and a white t-shirt. She desperately felt the need to paint and figured she'd better wear something that could easily be thrown away once she was done.

"Wanna hang with me, Jasper and Monty tonight ? I guess I'm gonna ask Octavia as well, but I feel like I should leave her alone for a while before talking to her." Raven said, still giggling.

"I guess you should leave her alone till she comes to talk to you." Clarke commented. "But yeah, sure… What are the plans ?"

"I don't know yet, you're the first one I'm asking to." Raven said, grabbing her phone.

 **TheGreatMechanic 1.15 p.m**

GUYS, I'm using the groupchat so I don't have to text everyone I know.

 **JasperTheOnly 1.23 p.m**

Reyes, you forgot to tell us why you're texting us

Dumbass

 **TheGreatMechanic 1.25 p.m**

Right

Drinks 2nite ?

Lady Griffin is coming

So is O

 **Monty 1.26 p.m**

Why am I the only one with a normal screen name ? Anyways, I'm down

 **JasperTheOnly 1.29 p.m**

Same here, I'm always down for drinks with Raven TequilaShots Reyes

 **ClarkeFromTheSky 1.29 p.m**

Why am I Lady Griffin ?

Shots at Polaris ! Hoping the magic wooing duo won't get us kicked out again

 **OctaviaTheWarrior 1.45 p.m**

OCTAVIA IS NOT COMING

OCTAVIA NEEDS TO STUDY

"Whatever !" Clarke heard Raven yelling.

She got dressed and proceeded to sit on her bed.

As the night approached, Clarke thought again about Lexa. Their encounter had been magical and she knew that Lexa felt the same way. She figured a woman like her would have found her soulmate already, which meant there was nothing to hope for. Still, Clarke couldn't stop thinking about her. She got ready for their night out and was pleased when Raven told her that Octavia was going to go to Polaris as well, right after practice. Raven could be a handful whenever they were out, always drinking way too much and making a fool of herself most of the time. Having Octavia there as well meant having a bit of help, since neither Jasper nor Monty helped her when Raven went on party mode. Monty found it terribly funny and Jasper was like her, if not even worse.

She walked to the living room, to find Raven waiting for her.

"Why am I waiting for you ?" Raven asked, playfully annoyed.

"Because we're early, but you are a sucker for party nights. Let's go."

\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\

Practice had been fun. She had missed football, it was great being back. Every muscle in her body felt sore and she was already covered in bruises, but it didn't matter. Football was her thing and nothing would ever compare to those moments on the field.

"You did great, Commander." Octavia smirked. "As per usual."

"Thanks, mighty Warrior. I desperately need a shower now, though." Lexa said, taking her shoes off. Even when training for football, she was used to wearing long sleeved t-shirts, since Clarke apparently only drew on her arms, or her stomach. It was a habit of hers, she couldn't risk anyone seeing the drawings on her skin. She was embarrassed because she wasn't ready to meet her soulmate and she didn't want to have to explain why to people who asked. That was why she opted for long sleeves, always telling people that her soulmate had never drawn anything. Which was a huge lie, considering Clarke's masterpieces she adored so much. She didn't quite understand why people were so interested in soulmates and romance. She did understand being obsessed with their own… But why was it so important to ask about other people's love life ? The only person who fully knew her story was her sister, Anya. Because she was there when everything happened.

She slowly took her socks and shorts off, when she heard Octavia gasp behind her back. She quickly turned around, worried by the inhuman sound that had previously escaped Octavia's mouth.

"What ?" She asked

"That… That drawing." Octavia said, pointing her index to Lexa's left foot. "I… You…"

Lexa panicked. What was she going to say ? She was scared Octavia might be pissed because she didn't tell her about her drawings.

"I like keeping them for myself." She whispered.

"No, no, no. You don't understand. I know the person whose hand draws that stuff. I would recognize her drawings among thousands."

Lexa looked at her for a second. Panic was the only emotion that she was feeling. Then it hit her. Clarke had told her about her roommate playing football, of course it had to be Lexa's only friend. Was she going to tell Octavia that she knew her as well ? Or was she going to keep it a secret and play it cool ?

She wanted to keep it a secret, not wanting Clarke to know. Maybe she could talk to Octavia and explain to her the whole thing. She was smart, she would understand. They were friends, she could talk to her about Costia.

Or couldn't she ?

"You're coming with me tonight."

 _Times that I've seen you lose your way, you're not in control and you won't be told. All I can do to keep you safe is hold you close, hold you close til you can breathe on your own, til you can breathe on your own._  
 _Hold tight; you're slowly coming back to life, I'll be keeping your head up, I'll be keeping your head up, darling. Let go of all your haunted dreams tonight, I'll be keeping your head up._  
 _Everyone keeps a darker place, to lose control, you're not alone. And when you come looking for embrace, I know your soul; I'll be your home, til you can breathe on your own_  
 _You never think that you can fly, you'll always swim against the tide. Don't you know your pain is mine ? And I would die a thousand times to ease your mind._


	5. Hey

"Do you think Octavia will be here soon ?" Clarke asked Monty, who was sitting next to her. Raven and Jasper were together, being each other's wingman, it was hilariously disgusting.

"I hope so." He said, taking a sip of his beer.

They talked for a while, till they saw Octavia walking in, with a girl next to her. It took Clarke a full minute to realize that the girl standing next to her roommate was Lexa, the girl from that morning. What were the odds ?

"Guys, this is Lexa, she plays football with me." Octavia said, cheerfully. "Lexa, these are my roommate Clarke and a friend of ours, Monty." The way Octavia marked Clarke's name made Lexa wince.

"Oh, I already know her." Clarke said, much to Octavia's disbelief. "Remember when I was talking about the girl who sent her iced tea flying all over me ?" Clarke laughed softly and Lexa blushed, hiding her face in her hands.

Octavia eyed both of them suspiciously. "Lexa, let's go get us something to drink." She said, grabbing her by her arm and dragging her towards the bar.

Once they were far enough from Clarke and Monty, Octavia finally spoke. "Does she know ? Do _you_ know ?"

"I found out this morning." Lexa stated. "She doesn't know and I don't want her to know, not yet."

"Alright, take your time." Octavia said, before ordering two tequilas. "Just keep in mind that Clarke is slightly obsessed with the whole soulmate thing. She is always complaining about how her person… Well, you, never draw. She thinks she's destined to be alone."

"She's not destined to be alone… I was never really into this soulmate thing. Her drawings started appearing on my skin when I was about fifteen, which is earlier than usual. I'm used to them, they're part of who I am, as weird as it might sound. At the beginning, I was just embarrassed. I saw these incredible drawings on my arms and stomach and couldn't help but think that I wasn't worthy of the person creating them. She was very young when she started and I kind of witnessed the progress she made, you know ? Her drawings made me feel great, as if I had been chosen by somebody special. I was scared my markings or whatever else I might draw on my skin weren't going to be enough. I wanted my person to feel the same way they made me feel. But I never could. I wasn't worthy, you know ? Then I met someone, but I knew she wasn't the one. She wasn't sixteen yet, and was sure her drawings were going to appear on my skin once she turned the proper age. Of course, she didn't know about Clarke's drawings, nobody did. I didn't have the heart to tell her. When she turned sixteen, she came to me and drew a small heart on her hand. Nothing appeared on mine, of course. She took it pretty badly… The rest doesn't matter. What I'm trying to tell you is that I'm not ready. And I'm not sure I'll ever be."

"Then I'm guessing you're going to need this." Octavia said, offering her a tequila.

Lexa smiled at her, Octavia _was_ smart. She had accepted her answer, no questions asked. They both downed their tequilas before going back to Clarke and Monty, who were still looking at Raven and Jasper.

"So, as you might already know, Octavia is my roommate and the other one I told you about is Raven, the girl you see dancing on that table down there." Clarke explained to Lexa, pointing her thumb at Raven. "She enjoys drinking. The boy next to her is Jasper, Monty's roommate."

"She does look like she enjoys having fun !" Lexa laughed. "I know it's kinda lame since we're out for drinks, but… I already know that you're majoring in Biology, I think Octavia mentioned studying Business, what about you Monty ? And what about the two players down there ?"

"Computer science, for me." Monty laughed. "Raven is majoring in Mechanical Engineering, while Jasper is studying Chemistry. We're all big nerds. Most of us, at least… Octavia is the only one who actually enjoys sports and stuff."

"She enjoys hiking, guys. She's weird." Clarke whispered, and Octavia elbowed her in the ribs.

"I do too !" Lexa commented.

"You outdoorsy weirdos." Monty said, under his breath. Clarke laughed out loud, while Octavia rolled her eyes.

"I have abs, guys. Like, real, actual abs !"

How was she going to compete with her friends ? Not that she needed to, but they were amazing. Smart, sassy, incredibly fun to be with. She was just boring, average, Lexa.

Clarke was used to greatness, she was just going to be disappointed in Lexa. She definitely wasn't ready to tell Clarke that she wasn't destined to be alone. She thought about how she'd imagined her to be and was stunned to realize that Clarke was even better than expected. She made her feel things in her stomach eve if they'd known each other for not even a day.

"Lexa does, too." Octavia continued. Her comment made Lexa's blood freeze in her veins. She blushed instantly elbowing her teammate right in the ribs. Octavia groaned and rolled her eyes, this rib hitting was getting out of control.

Lexa didn't know what to say, and was saved last minute by a very drunk Raven who was stumbling to get back to their table. Once she got there, she eyed Lexa curiously.

"Who's this?" She asked.

"This is Lexa, she plays football with me." Octavia explained.

"Oh no, another sportsperson. Fuck my life." She slurred, sitting right next to Lexa.

"What is it that you guys have against sports ?" Lexa asked, she had never met that many people who hated sports in her whole life.

"We're lazy, that's it." Clarke commented. "We're also terrible at anything physical."

"I wouldn't say that, Griffin. Sex is physical, I'm good at it. Not so sure about your skills, though." Raven said and Lexa was positive it was the first time she saw Clarke actually blushing and being embarrassed.

"It doesn't look like it, found anyone to bang for the night ?" The blonde asked.

Raven frowned. "Nope, found a girl for Jasper, though."

"You're hopeless." Octavia and Clarke said at unison.

 _I see the look on your face telling me your story, you don't have to be alone. I love to see you smiling, why you trying to hide it ? Don't you know you've got it all ?_  
 _I know when you're gone you do your thing and you live like you want. I know when you're gone you're just looking for a little sign of love._  
 _I said hey, would you come with me ? I said, hey, hey. Hey, would you stay with me ? I said hey, hey._


	6. Ink

As weeks passed, Lexa had gotten accustomed to spending most of her free time with Clarke, Octavia and Raven. As much as she enjoyed being alone, the time she spent with them, particularly with Clarke, made her realize that there was something missing in her life. Something she had never thought she'd need. Something she had always tried to avoid, to run away from.

And that something had blond hair and sky blue eyes.

"So, we are leaving." She heard Octavia saying. "Apparently Raven needs to get stuff from the grocery store at midnight, and guess who has to go with her ?"

Lexa chuckled softly, while Clarke laughed out loud. "You, because I can't move... It's too late, I don't have it in me." The blonde said, rather dramatically.

"Sure, Griffin. Of course." Octavia sighed and slammed the door behind her back.

"I've been meaning to ask you something." Clarke said, after a few minutes of silence.

"Sure, go ahead."

"What do you think of the whole soulmate thing ?"

Lexa felt her heart skip a bit, but smiled at Clarke. "I've actually had a pretty bad experience with it, this is why I never talk about it."

Clarke tilted her head and looked at her curiously. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you."

"No, it's okay." Lexa said. She knew she could tell Clarke the whole story. She owed her an explanation. Clarke still didn't know that they were soulmates... but she was suffering because of Lexa. "I was never really into the soulmate thing, and when I started getting my drawings it wasn't really a big deal. I loved them, I still do, but it was weird to me to think that there was someone I was destined to be with. Then I met this girl, her name was Costia… When we got together she was still fifteen and she was sure I was her soulmate. She didn't know about the drawings, I didn't have the heart to tell her. We had been together for roughly a year when she turned sixteen. She came to see me, she was really excited… But I was scared. She drew a little heart on her hand and took mine to hold. Nothing appeared. She waited, and waited, not sure about how long it takes. When it hit her, I saw her expression changing. I could see rage flashing through her eyes. She said nothing, and left with tears in her eyes. She was distracted, I guess the tears had blurred her vision… She didn't even see the car that hit her. She died before I even got the chance to call an ambulance."

She looked over at Clarke, who had glossy eyes. "I'm so sorry."

"Oh… It's okay." Lexa commented. "It was years ago… I thought I'd never get over the pain, but I did. I'm used to having people I love dying anyways, so…" Her voice trailed off and Clarke was still staring at her.

"What do you mean ?" The blonde asked, before she could stop herself. She cursed under her breath for asking such a stupid question.

"My parents died when I was fifteen. My sister took care of me till I turned eighteen."

Clarke instinctively placed her hand on Lexa's, who was startled by the unfamiliar and yet comforting touch. "I lost my dad too, I was seventeen."

"I'm sorry." Lexa said. "I know how you feel. I have been trying to avoid my family since my parents died.. The only relative I am able to see is my sister, Anya."

"I'm an only child, I don't really have many relatives.. I have my mother, but sometimes I wish I had somebody else, I don't know." Clarke sighed loudly. " But, wait... You said you got your drawings... Have you met your soulmate yet ?"

Lexa didn't know what to say. Saying no was a lie, but saying yes was going to make things even weirder. "No, I haven't... I am kind of scared. What happened with Costia destroyed me... I don't know when I'll be ready to be the person who's destined to be with me forever."

"I'm sure your person will understand." Clarke stated.

 _Yes, I really hope she will._

"I feel like I'm destined to be alone... Octavia got her drawings, Raven got hers... And you did as well. I'm the only one who hasn't gotten any yet. Nothing, not even a mark made by mistake."

"I'm sure you'll get them. You are definitely not destined to be alone." Lexa said as a matter of fact.

"How can you tell ?"

Lexa opened her mouth to say something, but was interrupted by Octavia and Raven slamming the door open. Clarke yanked her hand off Lexa's, before her roommates could see her.

"We're back bitches ! And we brought nachos !" Raven jumped on the second couch, while Octavia sighed and brought the grocery bags in the kitchen.

"We're watching a movie now."

Raven picked a scary movie, but they all fell asleep before it was over. When Lexa was startled awake by Raven's loud snoring, she was pleased to see that Clarke's hand was back on hers. She smiled and slowly got up, trying to be as quite as possible.

She gently shook Clarke to wake her up and the blonde looked at her confusedly.

"I didn't want to leave without saying goodbye."

"Thank you for that, what time is it ?" Clarke mumbled.

"It's almost three in the morning, I should get going."

Clarke nodded and walked her to the door. "Thank you for tonight… You know, for sharing."

"Thank you, Clarke. Goodnight !" She placed a soft kiss on the top of Clarke's head that made the blonde blush.

"Text me when you get home." Clarke whispered, before closing the door.

Lexa quietly walked to her car and then drove back home. She texted Clarke as soon as she locked the door behind her back.

 **TheForestCommander 3.08 a.m**

Made it home safely !

 **ClarkeFromTheSky 3.09 a.m**

I'm glad to hear that, I was waiting for your text ! I'm dying to go to bed… Goodnight sweet cheeks

 **TheForestCommander 3.10 a.m**

Goodnight, Sky princess.

She scrolled through her contacts and quickly found Anya's number. She pressed dial and waited for her sister to pick up.

"Lexa ? Are you okay ?" Anya sounded terribly worried.

"I'm fine… I wanted to talk to you about something."

She heard her sister sigh from the other line. "It better be important, seeing you woke me at this ungodly hour."

"It's pretty important. I know how sensitive you are about your sleep time. So, I told Clarke about Costia… And about mum and dad."

There was a pause. "You did."

"Yeah… I felt like I kind of owed her an explanation, even if she doesn't know that I'm her soulmate." That word was still foreign to her. But what was even more strange was that she could actually picture a face when saying it."And the death of our parents just came up."

"I see… What did she say ?"

"She cried when I told her about Costia and told me that she lost her father as well when she was younger." Lexa stated.

"Alright… Anything else you wanted to say ?"

"Yes, actually." Lexa took a deep breath. "I want to draw something back."

She heard Anya gasp. "Are you sure ? Like a hundred percent sure ? There's no going back from this. You've known her for like three weeks, you need to think about it a bit more."

"I'm sure."

Lexa _was_ sure. As she waited for Anya to talk, she uncovered her arms and grabbed a marker. She didn't know what to write, or to draw… Apparently having a soulmate actually meant having a connection, because she saw a new drawing starting to appear on her now blank skin. A delphinium, her favourite flower. She waited for Clarke to finish her flower, and then took off the cap of her marker. Her hand was shaking as the marker brushed her skin for the first time since she was a kid.

 _Got a tattoo said 'together thru life'. Carved in your name with my pocket knife. And you wonder when you wake up will it be alright, feels like there's something broken inside. All I know, is that I'm lost whenever you go. All I know, is that I love you so, so much that it hurts._


End file.
